April's Life Adventures

Sunday, November 06, 2005

The Gimp Strikes Again

So last night was an amazing night for me. I was invited to play in a concert with Kurt Bestor! I was placed as the principal (or first chair) viola. For those of you who have never heard of Kurt Bestor, I highly recommend that you listen to his "Prayer of the Children"... You will cry! I absolutely loved the concert, and my husband raved about it for the entire ride home. Not to mention Kurt told the audience that we were the best group of musicians that he had EVER worked with... A great ego boost to be sure!

On to the rest of my post. When I was young, I crashed my bike into a truck. No it was not moving, yes I broke many bones including a hip, and yes I have been embarrassed by it ever since. It was not the first and definitely not the last of my embarrassing situations. One main theme in my life however is that I accidentally hurt myself. Not quite as often now as I did when I was in high school, but enough that I earned a nick name.

After my bike accident, I suddenly had one leg that was longer than the other (bones didn't heal right... Long story). I still have hip problems to this day and would need my cane on average of one week out of every month. Anyway, I tripped a lot. I sprained ankles, wrists, shoulders. Nothing really serious, except for one thing. I always seemed to be going to school using either crutches or a cane. This can be social suicide in high school, and it was. I was known as "The Gimp" or "Gimpy" for short. I hated that name. I truly was not just clumsy, I didn't know why I kept falling it was just a part of my life.

Just before I left home for college, we finally figured out the whole one leg longer than the other thing. This revelation was huge for me! I suddenly knew why I was tripping all the time! I began to compensate for the difference, and cut down on my accidents dramatically.

Occasionally however, I am still haunted by the attention that accompanies an accident. Last night, I ran into the store for some baby wipes after dropping off my baby sitter. I was still in my black concert attire complete with these pretty black heals that I absolutely love. I was on a high that always comes from performing well, and last night was no exception. On the baby isle, there was a small spot of water, and with my luck, I walked right through it without thinking. Next thing I knew I was flat on my face in front of a lot of people with an ankle that I couldn't stand on. I wanted to cry. Since we had come to this town, I hadn't needed my cane much (three weeks out of the past two years), so I was able to hide the fact that I have a deformed hip to most everyone. Here I was, in front of caring people who refrained (thankfully) from laughing. I know that a lady dressed from head to toe in black flying through the air is comical, but if they had laughed I would have burst into tears right there.

I finally regained my feet, but it was quite painful to put any weight on my foot, and definitely couldn't put my shoe back on. I was ready to skulk out of there when the store manager told me that I needed to fill out an incident report because it happened in their store. Ugh. They fetched me a chair, and I sat there on the verge of tears filling out a stupid report and enduring the pitiful stares of strangers. I did however make it into my car before I cried... For that I am proud. Some day I would like to leave the gimp in a grave somewhere. However, I am realizing that she is a part of who I am. But next time I see someone fly through the air, I will be the first one there to help them escape the situation with their pride intact. I am still embarrassed, but thanks to the wonderful shoulder that my husband provided for me to cry on, I am dealing with it a whole lot better than I used to.

Posted by April_Mommy :: 3:14 PM :: 9 comments